HIS FIRST TOOTH IS COMING IN!

first swing
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

We discovered a budding tooth this morning! Well, actually, I discovered it the hard way in the middle of the night last night, when I felt in Noah's mouth to see if the abrasive and rather shocking feeling while nursing him was just my imagination. It wasn't. I had half forgotten about it by the time I felt it again while he was gnawing on my finger today. Abby felt it too! She seems very excited about it, and she got to tell Matthew about it.

No wonder Noah has been restless. We will dearly miss his toothless grin. We wont miss the buckets of drool, but I have a feeling we've got LOTS more of that coming...

me and my first "real" cake

me and my first "real" cake
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

I'm 30 now.

I woke up on my b-day morning with Abby snuggled on one side and Noah burrowed in between Matty and I on my other side. The queen size bed is really too small for us now. Noah did his morning stretch and toot routine and I said to him : "Oh, is that my present! Thank you!" Abby (half asleep) cried out: "I was supposed to give you your present--I was supposed to give you the earrings as a surprise!" Te cat out of the bag, the rest of the morning was spent trying to console poor Abby, who was convinced she had ruined the day by accident. All worked out though; she and Matty stopped by a cute store in town on the way home from school and got me some gorgeous bird and nest stamps, and some Eiffel tower/Paris stamps. Abby also made some lovely drawings for me!

Before having a wnderful Thai (take out) dinner, I decorated this cute little cake, which is here displayed on an adorable robin's egg blue cake stand--my gift from Nonee (Gwenn), my mom's momma. You can see another pic of the top of the cake on my flickr reel (just click on this picture). I was showered with love and affection from my family and friends--cards, emails, calls, well wishes from across seas...how good it is to be loved so much!

The morning after my birthday, Abby snuggled me on the couch and said: "You're just the same; you still just look like a momma." Well, thank goodness I do! I am so glad to be G and 30.

"Enjoy your last day in your twenties!"

As she left for work, my friend Bronwyn gave me this greeting: "Enjoy your last day in your twenties!" There was glee (the good kind, not the mean kind) in her voice, and a giggle too--she is already 30 and I got to razz her too. I hadn't thought about this day that way. I've got lots of muddled emotions about the whole thing, and thought I might cry, but really, I am quite happy to be entering my 30's. I have very high hopes that they will be less tumultuous than my 20's. Don't get me wrong, 20's have been great: I finished two degrees, got married, was a college ministry intern, had TWO babies, bought and sold my (our) first house, made lifelong friends, traveled a little bit, began a PhD, learned how to scrapbook, sew,quilt, cook, garden, research, write, teach college kids, teach my own kids, blog, air up a bike tire, do pretty much anything with one hand (or no hands!), figured out what my favorite color is, leared to LOVE thai, indian, and afghani food, figured out that I actualy DO like the open possibilities of a ranch style house, and on and on... Of course the 20's brought other things too: I lost two grandparents (my dad's folks), found out that marriage can be lonely (big shocker, actually) and requires LOTS of work (another shocker--hey, I watched too much Ane of Green Gables, alright?), I also found out that: kids can drive you a little nuts--mostly because you love them so much that they can really get to you, getting babies on a schedule is HARD work, exercizing isn't easy either, I really am NOT in control of a lot of things, and I can't totally protect my loved ones; there is a difference between hurting and harming people (and sometimes hurting them means they are protected from harm! Think vaccines, boundaries, loving honesty, etc.). I survived young Calvinist's disease (at east, I think I did), and made it through my second childbirth without an epidural. My 20's brought real struggles with anxiety, high blood pressure, real life hurts and even feeling depression.

I don't think I've got it all figured out; if anything, I've figured out that I wont ever "firgure it all out" but that I can survive (maybe even thrive at times) though uncertainty. I look forward to the richness that comes with having loved, served, and struggled alongside my life-partner, Matthew. I do NOT look forward to the loss that is sure to come in this life--the loss that takes my breath away at the tiniest thought--that of the most precious lives I am honored to share this life with. I'm in a tender spot at the moment--feeling pretty raw, pretty open to the wonder and the pain of living. This isn't altogether bad. Tears can be good (as I'm trying to explain to Abby, who wonders why sometimes people cry when they are happy). I think happy tears come when you finally realize how special the good things in life are, and how much those things should mean!

And now, I am going to try to do it: Enjoy this last day in my twenties. I've already done my research work for the day (did that first), and now I need to frost a cake, safety pin Abby's quilt so I can start quilting it, and hang out with Noah (who is practicing a new skill, to our great delight: blowing raspberries!). Life is pretty good.

Practice Run

deco fun
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

We busted out the cake decorating goodies to try our hands at decorating a cake. Abby loved it--as you can see. The sticks protruding from the cake are glow in the dark bracelets. They added a *special* flare to the cake. Tonight at my decorating class, I will decorate another cake; this one will end up being my birthday cake for tomorrow (Wednesday) night.

Hanging on by a thread...

Abby's quilt (in progress)
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

This is the top of Abby's quilt, which has been my latest sewing project. I still need to back it, quilt it, and bind it. The pillow, however, is done. Abbs seems to like it, and I am excited to see it come to fruition after staring at piles of tiny scraps on my sewing desk (in the corner of the livingroom) and wishing I could put more than a 10 minute dent in it at a time. One thing I have discovered: The G needs a room of her own. I dream of a room with wall to wall craft stations...sewing, scrabooking, painting. I want to try my hand at pottery, but that can't be done around the fabric! I can hear my future-self now: Noah, step away from the fabric. You have the right to remain muddy, but not in my craft room! I want to try sewing something with a pattern (like a skirt or apron) next. We will see if I find time for that.

I am taking a cake decorating class. I'll share pics of my cullinary handiwork soon--good, bad or ugly.

go VOLS!

go VOLS!
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

Well, the Vols didn't beat Florida, but Noah was so cute in his t-shirt that we were consoled. He seems to like watching football.

first bites of rice cereal

first bites of rice cereal
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

Abby fed Noah his first bites; he was thankful. I think his cereal smells like seaweed--Matthew got him the DHA stuff (from algae oil). He seems to like it! Maybe he will be a sushi lover.

So Close, but So Far Away

I think things often seem simultaneously so close and so far away. The exhilaration and frustration of ALMOST is what many of us secretly seek; sometimes ALMOST is just another way to describe the reality of not being in control.

I've been "off-line" for a while as I wait for Apple to replace my computer, which hit the magic number (4) of break-downs. Apple has replaced the logic board thrice, and now my little silver friend has been shipped off for the scrap pile. I feel like I just sentenced R2-D2 or C-3PO to machine purgatory, or worse! And now I wait...and check the FedEx tracking number...again....again...and I watch as my new computer leaves Shanghai, passes through Alaska, Indianapolis. They tell me it will be Tuesday before it arrives. Baaa.

I miss my old, unreliable mac.

Another ALMOST: We live just an hour from Berkeley. For years M and I have known that the Tennessee VOLS would play the Cal Bears in Berkeley in September of 2007 (I'm talking about football, people). We did not know, however, that we would have an infant by the time the game rolled around and that said infant would not be much of a bottle-taker, making the babysitting option not an option. Alas, the game ensued with us watching from Davis and not "re-living" our first date (M took me to a VOLS game in Knoxville some eight years ago). That said, we're sure glad we have Noah Bean. Oh yeah, and the VOLS lost, so we would have had a long, bummerish ride home from Berkeley anyway.

other ALMOSTS? We ALMOST got 3 hours of sleep the night before last (fussy baby).
I've ALMOST started exercising again. And studying again. And cleaning the house again; wait, I didn't do that much before...ha!

And you, yes you, reading this blog post, don't ALMOST call me and say hi. Do it! Write me a snail mail letter! If that's not enticing enough, write Abby a letter; that kid LOVES to get mail. She checks the mail box every day (and usually complains about not having anything in the mail). Even better, send her a new chapter book or a (non-lead-tainted) toy!

Alright, I'm about to have ALMOST had time for a latte before Noah wakes up!
See ya!

planning her party...

Abby will turn 6 years old this January (16th). Up until now, the rush of the holidays (plus Matthew's birthday falling on Dec. 21st) has left me bedraggled by the time it comes to a kiddo party. Abby has had celebrations, but nothing really well planned or anticipated. This year, she has asked for a "Ratatouille" party--a chef party with a Parisian-restaurant setting, inspired by the new Pixar film. Now, I'd LOVE to celebrate her birthday in Paris; heck, I'd let her rent real rats if it meant going to Paris, but we're going to attempt to transform our humble apartment in Davis into a chic Parisian and save a few thousand dollars.

So far we're set on letting her friends decorate their own cupcakes with real decorating gear. We're going to have chef hats, etc. I've been searching for an Eiffel tower lamp or something, but no dice so far. I know I have a few readers out there, so PLEASE write in with your brilliant ideas about cool ways to make the party tres tres chic and not just kitch. Merci beaucoup, mes amis!

little momma

little momma
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

Abby is AWESOME with Noah. She gets tired of him from time to time, but she enjoys him too. Abby is excited about her similarities to mom and dad: she now has homework, like us; she goes to school, like us; she can eat burgers, shrimp, thai food, and dessert, like us. But Noah can't--he's "just a baby." I feel a real kinship with Abby, a friendship and a closeness. This pales when she is whiney or grumpy, but then I'm sure I'm much less pleasant when I'm whiney and grumpy too.

self-portrait

self-portrait
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

Not much time to write at the moment, but had to post a couple of pics. This one needs a happy John Denver song playing in the background...Sunshine, on my shoulders makes me happy...

growing boy

Noah weighs 13.9 pounds! He is in the 35th percentile (or so) for weight and 60th for height. He is as healthy as can be and doing everything he is supposed to for his age (even without subtracting the extra four weeks!). The shots caused a fever for a day and a half, but all's well now. More pics to come soon.

fish face

fish face
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

M always did this to Abby's face when she was an infant. Actually, he still does it; there's just not as much to squish.

Matthew just told me that Noah said "Elmo" earlier today. Noah talks a ton to Matthew--not so much to me. Me, he bites. And we're talking hard bites on sensitive places (if you know what I mean, nursing moms...). But then he smiles at me and I forgive him.

ABBY fish face
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

Ha! I found proof. Here is M fish-facing Abby back in 2002.

I'm 4 1/2 months old!

I'm4 1/2 months old!
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

Little Noah likes to stand (and drool, and and pant like a puppy, and grab hair, and smile...). We think he weighs about 13.5 pounds now, but we will get the official weigh-in tomorrow at his 4-month appt. with the doc. Yes, shots come along with this appointment, so we're probably in for a couple of icky days and nights. Stay tuned for his stats...

climbing

climbing
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

A friend of Matthew's took some great pics of the Pearsons4 yesterday. Here is one of Abby climbing at a park near our apartment.

Deflated

How do you spell disappointment? Abby was invited to her friend Blake's birthday party at a place called "Pump it Up!" This is a huge bounce-house place--a veritable air and plastic heaven for 5 year olds. Well, I just got a call from Matthew and there is a power line down somewhere and NO power to run the air generators. The poor kids are sitting in a dim room at picnic tables, eating pizza and feeling truly sad about not bouncing their fool heads off. I feel like crying for Blake, for Abby, for Blake's parents. I mean, what a serious bummer--to look forward for weeks to a big bouncing party and to be met with flattened dreams. What a stunning visual--all these kids looking out at a sea of lost potential, and all they need is AIR to make the place come alive. It seems a moving image of what we are without Christ's spirit: Emptied out and incapable of serving the very function for which we were designed, needing only to be made full and able by the power which cannot be self-generated, the breath of life.

I'm praying that Pacific Gas and Electric arrives soon and "saves the day." I'm also hoping that Abby can collect herself and realize that this day is about celebrating Blake, not about bouncing. That may be asking too much of a disappointed 5 year old. SIGH.

first day of Kindergarten!

first day of Kindergarten!
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

Here is Abby this morning, all ready for her first day of Kindergarten. She chose her uniform last night, laid it out on her chair. This morning she wanted a braid and a bow (robin's egg blue ribbon, please), and little blue dot earrings. Oh, and we touched up her pink nail polish too... Shopping for school supplies was as fun as I remember it being. Abby brought her list and checked off the items as they went into our cart. Actually, she checked each of them about four times (multiplying that wonderful sense of completion and acquisition in a bright pink crayola marker). The "pink" eraser was a little on the reddish side for her taste, but she agreed it would do the trick. Watching her choose between glue sticks (the two pack or the three pack, hmmm.) was great. She opted for sensible yellow Ticonderoga No.2 pencils; the fancy pencils will make their way to school after she scopes out the kind of pencils other people bring. She likes fitting in, not sticking out, it would seem. She made other sensible choices, passing the candy aisle with comments about how candy isn't good for our bodies and how we can have treats from time to time but that we don't need candy (this just before we ate coldstone creamery ice cream). She mentioned to Noah that he didn't need to buy anything because he is too little for school. Noah looked at her with sleepy eyes and nodded off, giving us some space to finish our shopping. Abby chose the blue box of Kleenex, not the pink (I wonder how much of her affinity for blue is a desire to be like momma). But when it came to her new nail polish, only the pinkest of pinks would do. Watching her run to the car with her braid and blue ribbon bouncing, her eyes sparkling, and her anticipation rising, I grinned and felt a sweet sense of joy. Our little girl is really growing up. As Matty pulled away, I ducked back into the house to make my latte and post this picture. I am so thankful for Abby. What a gift she is.

blast off!

blast off!
Originally uploaded by gennabby.

To infinity and beyond! Abby spontaneously made a space suit out of newspaper yesterday. She was making a scrapbook page from a Montana paper with her grandmother, Mia's, picture in it, and after cutting the picture out, she decided not to let the rest of the paper go to waste. I don't know how much tape was used in this endeavor, but it was a hoot hearing her crinkle around the house in this astronaut gear, complete with face mask. I think the meteor shower and shuttle news of late, along with an outer space episode of Reading Rainbow, have led to this sudden interest in things celestial. I personally like the blast off sounds she makes: pshhhhhhhhhhhhh...

found 'em!

I found my long-lost keys! They've been gone for at least a month, probably two or three. I think I lost them before Noah was born! They were in the front office of our apartment building, in someone's drawer. Thank goodness!

Oh yeah, and Noah is still sleeping in his crib (it's been almost an hour)! This morning we've found the keys, painted Abby's nails, begun a diaorama (a small cardboard box for Abby's Ratatouille Rat party), had a latte, started cleaning up G's desk, made the bed, blogged twice, and put the dishes into the dishwasher! And all of this while wearing a bra and DAYtime clothes! Well, Abby is in her jammies still, but that's ok.

Seriously, once you have an infant, you realize how much you can do in a short period of time if they'll just take a quick nap in the crib!

waaaaaah

Noah has begun napping in his crib. This went swimmingly well yesterday and the day before, with Noah nodding off for every nap with less than a minute's worth of protest each time. This morning he is trying a different tactic: cry HARD, sound really MAD...Why today? Well, probably because Matthew is gone for the whole day working on the car in a friend's garage and Abby is home for the last weekday before the start of Kindergarten.

I guess I'll be less "productive" today than I thought. Sometimes I feel sorry for myself as much as I feel sorry for Noah. I have to remember how quickly these days go by and how much of an opportunity I have to love and care for this little one. When I look out at the next two years, I think: We're entering the long stretch of babyhood in which we all try to understand one another's needs (and try to meet them the best we can). It seems like a long time, but I know that it is gone in the blink of an eye, and then they are borrowing your clothes, asking questions you can't answer without help (if at all), and needing new levels of independence and freedom which require that you trust the foundations they have and that you trust God to do what you never could: guide and protect their steps. Sigh.

Life is such a mixed bag! Speaking of which, I've lost my keys--if anyone finds them, let me know. There are about 7 keys plus a blue and gold VW keychain. Tennessee and St. Louis folks, don't worry--they were lost before we came out there for a visit.

WAAAAAAAHHHHHH

p.s. Noah is now asleep in his crib. It took about 3 minutes in the rocking chair and he's out. Coffee time.