I can't say that I am sorry to see 2005 end. There were many wonderful joys, but this year also brought stunningly painful times. We said goodbye to Genna's Grandma Mildred (dad's mom) and Uncle Steve (dad's brother), and we prayed with our dear friends the Maynors as Brian fought cancer and finally went home to be with the Lord. I still lose my breath and cry when I read updates on the boys and Brian's wife, Susan. Within a small circle of close friends and family there have been weddings and divorces, births and miscarriages. After such a starkly ambivalent year, we are longing for peace, for tender quiet moments in which to wipe away tears and be reassured of our firm foundation.
Welcome, 2006. I know the numbers mean nothing, but it still feels nice to be reminded of renewal and fresh starts. I'm realizing more and more how strangely present the past feels, or perhaps, how we are such works in progress (as Rev. Scott Bridges reminded Matthew and I moments before prouncing us man and wife). I feel hopeful that no matter how "happy" this new year is (or isn't), we will learn, grow, change, and live each day knowing that we are loved and provided for.
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